Do you need a diagnosis?

Why self-recognition is real, and what the UK landscape looks like

Diagnosis can be helpful for access and understanding, but self-awareness and lived experience are equally real.

If you recognise patterns in your thinking, sensory world, energy, or relationships that match descriptions of autism, ADHD, or other forms of neurodivergence, that recognition matters. A clinical label can open doors to formal support, but it isn’t the only mark of legitimacy. Your experience is already evidence of who you are.

For many people, especially women, self-recognition is often the first moment of clarity after years of being told to “try harder” or “calm down.” It allows you to name things, make sense of past hurts, and begin asking for what you need. In the UK, where assessment routes can be slow, expensive, and sometimes retraumatising, trusting your own experience can be an empowering and protective act.

An official diagnosis can bring practical benefits such as access to certain workplace or educational adjustments and, at times, a shared clinical language that helps explain patterns to others. It can provide relief and validation after years of confusion. Yet the system itself is far from reliable or timely, particularly for women.

Waiting lists across the UK are long. NHS data and recent charity reports have shown that well over 170,000 people in England are currently waiting for an autism assessment. While guidance from NICE suggests that the process should not take more than a few months, real-world waits often last a year or more, depending on where you live. ADHD services are similarly overwhelmed, with adult referrals sometimes taking many months or even years to be seen.

Women are still diagnosed later, and often only after being misdiagnosed for years. Studies and advocacy groups have highlighted that up to eighty percent of autistic women receive an incorrect psychiatric diagnosis before autism is identified. Conditions such as anxiety, depression, eating disorders, bipolar disorder, or borderline personality disorder are frequently given first. This is partly because diagnostic tools were built around how autism and ADHD appear in men and boys, meaning many women have spent decades masking or misunderstanding their own needs.

These realities matter. They show that long waits, missed signs, and earlier misdiagnoses are not personal failings. They are symptoms of under-resourced systems and gendered diagnostic bias. For many women, the question “Do I need a diagnosis?” becomes “Can I get the support I need without one?” There is no single right answer.

If you recognise yourself in descriptions of neurodivergence, you are allowed to start supporting yourself right now. You can make small changes that bring comfort and ease, like adjusting your sensory environment, giving yourself permission to rest, or using routines that work with your energy rather than against it. Some people choose to keep notes about patterns they notice in their lives, so that if they do decide to pursue a diagnosis later, they already have a record of their experiences.

Support does not have to wait for a clinician. Peer groups, coaching designed for neurodivergent women, occupational therapy resources, and trauma-informed counselling can all help. If you decide to speak with your GP, you can ask about local services or Right to Choose options that sometimes shorten waiting times. But none of these steps make your self-recognition any less valid if you cannot or do not want to pursue formal assessment.

Above all, look after your mental health throughout the process. Being dismissed, misunderstood, or told conflicting stories about yourself can leave deep marks. Finding spaces where you are believed, whether that is through a therapist who understands neurodivergence or a gentle online community can help you begin to rebuild trust in your own perception.

Whether you already have a diagnosis, are waiting for one, or simply see yourself in these descriptions, you belong here. You do not need paperwork to understand your own brain. Your insight, your lived experience, and your self-knowledge are real.